Tomorrrow marks the third anniversary of the Afri-love Women community.
I started it on a whim, one sleepless night, a couple of months before my son was born. I’d wanted to start a Facebook group for a while but, I wasn’t clear on a purpose and so I let it be.
Thankfully, pregnancy insomnia was pretty productive for me (I also created the Soulful Branding Challenge course during this period!). On the night in question, after futile attempts at comfort, with all sorts of pillow configurations, Afri-love Women was born.
In the past 3 years, I have gained SO MUCH from the women in the group. The diversity of our members’ locations, backgrounds, experience, creative disciplines, perspectives and more – makes for such richness.
As I celebrate this little space on the internet, I would like to share three threes. Continue reading “Afri-love Women is 3! 3 lessons, 3 most popular topics + 3 reasons to join a personal/professional growth community”
Last year, my mentor gave me a real good dose of tough love. You know, the kind that you KNOW you need to hear but, you’re a crying mess nonetheless!
What brought this about?
As a person with so many interests, it’s hard for me to focus on just a few. Professionally, I do several things and even personally, I struggle with having a hobby because, there are at least 10 things I want to regularly be doing!
It’s just impossible to sustain so much at a high and meaningful level. Add to the challenge of also sustaining yourself – financially, physically, mentally etc.
Mastery can only come with focus. And focus has been my mission. Slowly but surely, I’ve been culling what I give my time to. But it’s hard! Emotions get in the way, distracting shiny objects get in the way and fear definitely gets in the way.
You might be over there wondering: “what does this have to do with soulful branding?”.
And may I add one more thing for you to question? The role of self-care in all of this. (It is after-all, self-love and self-care month, in our Afri-love is 10 celebrations!)
It took me a long time to write this episode because, even though I intuitively knew all these things are connected, I couldn’t quite articulate just how. Today, I will try.
Continue reading “Multi-passionate problems + a journey to less but better”
Our year of celebration continues and this month, our theme is self-love.
Afri-love was founded on the principle of self-love. The idea being that when we love ourselves – as we are – we can then create positive transformation, for ourselves, for our communities and for the world at large.
This was my wish for myself and my fellow Africans, given the too-common thinking we’re surrounded by, that anything from outside is better and more desirable.
While these are big mindsets to shift, I believe it all starts with us on an individual level. It all starts with the self.
Self-love vs self-care
Continue reading “On self-love + self-care: resources + goodies”
I often suffer bouts of imposter syndrome.
I find it difficult to celebrate my wins when they don’t live up to my expectations of where I should be. Rather than look at what is good, I find myself focusing on what I’m struggling with.
I’m guilty of the very things I’m always encouraging people to transcend.
I’m a fraud!
Continue reading “Imposter syndrome part I: Everyday Wonderwomen + being your own vibe”
In August 2017, 7 weeks after my son was born, time for self-care – actually, time for anything, other than looking after Leko – seemed like the biggest luxury in the world.
So I gave myself a challenge: commit to doing something for myself, every day of the coming month.
Doing things with a community of like-minded people is always amazing and so I roped in Afri-love Women and others to join in. Sharing helped with accountability, motivation and inspiration.
Let’s do it again!
After the success of that challenge, I’ve decided to run another, this February.
I’ve tweaked a few things, this time around. For those who like a bit of structure, the following are some specific prompts. There are 28 so you could very well choose one for each day of the month: Continue reading “#justformechallenge: how to enjoy 28 days of me-time this February”
Me-time can seem so elusive.
We are often last on our own lists but, this is the year it’s going to change, right?
I’m writing this after the third Afri-love Connection Club vision-boarding and goal-setting workshop I’ve run this year. Pretty much every single one of the 32 women who participated had space dedicated to how they were going to take better care of themselves and make more me-time this year. And I believed them!
But we know how it goes…
So how can we ensure that good intentions don’t fall away to let old habits and the busyness of life take over?
Continue reading “Me-time: 9 tips to enjoy more of it this year”
The Afri-love Connection Club is one of the highlights of my inadvertent “year of yes” (I finally read the Shonda Rhimes book this Christmas and it was a revelation!).
In May 2018, my friend and business BFF, Danielle Anderson of Step and Stone, launched the Afri-love Connection Club – a place for female founders to come together to transform their business and their lives.
We really had no idea what to expect when we began. Initially hoping for 15 members, within one day of launching, we had way more applicants than that! We had dreams but, would other women buy into them? Continue reading “Afri-love Connection Club for female founders”
Thursday marked the end of the #justformechallenge: a month of consciously creating me-time, every single day.
My #justformechallenge results
I succeeded in doing something, just for myself, for 30 out of the 31 days. On many occasions I felt like giving up – wanting to just skip the day. Often this happened when it got late, I was tired and doing something felt like a big effort. However, I was always glad to have insisted on getting off my behind (or staying on it, if the activity required it 🙂 and giving myself that time, if even for just 10 minutes. Continue reading “#justformechallenge: how a month of daily self-care went down”
A few months ago, I asked a question about me-time in the Afri-love Women group: “what do you do just for fun?” It seemed like it should be such an easy question but, I myself struggled to answer it.
See, there are things I love to do that I do out of necessity, such as yoga and cooking. Then there are things that I love but, don’t actively do. For various reasons (aka excuses!). For example, I love being by the ocean and swimming in it but, that’s not something I can currently incorporate into my weekly or even monthly schedule (or can I? …). I love to dance but… ok, I don’t really have a good excuse for this one. After all, as a teenager I would do this in my room all the time, with special coloured lightbulbs to set the scene and everything!
I appreciate that there are some mental blocks at play. Continue reading “#justformechallenge: let’s make August all about me-time”
Last week I launched the Afri-love Women Facebook group, for creative African women balancing self-care and professional excellence.
When I started this blog, almost 7 years ago, I always had a vision that it would be more than just a one-way conversation. That it would lead to activities and initiatives in the real world. In late 2015, I held the Afri-love Sundown Sessions – 3 intimate evenings of live music, co-hosted with musician Sirena Riley. Late last year, I co-hosted a Nairobi brunch for women creatives, together with the Nzinga Effect. Both events were successful in many ways and, I received such great feedback from attendees. I knew that I wanted to create more opportunities for interaction with like-minded people – in real life and virtually as well – and the Afri-love Women Facebook group is step one.
Continue reading “Real talk for creative African women – join in!”